The New Howell Theater

presents

Of KINGS and
CONCUBINES

A Screenplay

by

Ronald L. Ecker


Copyright 2001, 2009 by Ronald L. Ecker
All Rights Reserved



Log line: (Comedy.) A biblical comedy of errors that reveals why the Bible names two different women, Bathsheba and Bathshua, as the mother of King David's son Solomon.






The New Howell Theater






"Of Kings and Concubines" has been divided into four Web pages, which helps with the downloading time. A "Go to" link at the bottom of each page will take you to the next page.










               FADE IN:

               INT. A CATHOLIC SEMINARY CLASSROOM - DAY (THE PRESENT)

               A CATHOLIC PRIEST, 50, teaches a class of SEMINARIANS.  All
               wear cassocks.  The priest, with a pointer in hand, stands 
               at the blackboard, on which are three names.

                                   PRIEST
                         Now the story of King David in the
                         Bible includes a great mystery. 
                         According to the books of Samuel
                         and Kings, the mother of David's
                         son Solomon -
                             (pointing to first name)
                         - was "Bathsheba, the daughter of
                         Eliam."  But according to the First
                         Book of Chronicles -
                             (pointing to second name)
                         - the mother was "Bathshua, the
                         daughter of Ammiel."  It appears 
                         to be two different women.  

               The priest points to the third name (Uriah's) on the board.

                                   PRIEST (cont'd)
                         Bathsheba, we know, was the wife 
                         of "Uriah the Hittite," one of 
                         King David's warriors.  But who 
                         was Bathshua?  One of King David's
                         wives?  Was she one of his
                         concubines?  How many know what 
                         a concubine is?

               All raise their hands.  The priest points at SEMINARIAN #1.

                                   PRIEST (cont'd)
                         Yes?

                                   SEMINARIAN #1
                         A concubine is sort of a live-in
                         mistress.

                                   PRIEST
                         Bingo.  Collectively, a king's
                         concubines were known as a harem. 
                         A eunuch would be placed in charge
                         of a harem, since a castrated man
                         wasn't likely to fool around with
                         the king's concubines.

               SEMINARIAN #2 raises his hand.

                                   PRIEST (cont'd)
                         Yes?

                                   SEMINARIAN #2
                         That reminds me of a good eunuch
                         joke.

                                   PRIEST
                         Well, don't leave us all hanging.

                                   SEMINARIAN #2
                         Not everyone could be a king's
                         eunuch.  You had to be cut out 
                         for the job.

               Some seminarians laugh, others groan.

                                   SEMINARIAN #3
                         You know what they say.  Once a
                         eunuch, always a eunuch.

                                   SEMINARIAN #4
                         Do you know why eunuchs are no good
                         at gambling?  They like to play
                         double or nothing.

               Laughter.  The priest taps on his desk with the pointer.

                                   PRIEST
                         All right, that's enough about
                         eunuchs.  Let me remind you that
                         everyone in this room is a eunuch
                         for the kingdom of heaven.  If
                         anyone isn't, if anyone here is
                         unchaste, indulging in sins of 
                         the flesh -
                             (raising his hand)
                         - raise your hand.

               No hand is raised but the priest's.  The seminarians snicker. 
               The priest lowers his hand with a bothered look.

                                   PRIEST (cont'd)
                         I was demonstrating how to do it. 
                         Now let's get back to the question. 
                         What was it?

               SEMINARIAN #5 raises his hand.  

                                   SEMINARIAN #5
                         Who the real mother was.

                                   PRIEST
                         Bingo.  It's an insolvable mystery.
                         The key to help solve the riddle
                         would be this woman Bathshua.

               The priest walks over to a wall map of biblical Israel.

                                   PRIEST (cont'd)
                         Who was she?  What is her story? 
                         There is no way to know.  We would
                         have to go back to the reign of
                         King David.
                             (pointing on the map)
                         We would have to be in or around
                         the city of Jerusalem -

               EXT. NEAR JERUSALEM - DAY (LATE AFTERNOON, 1000 B.C.)

               The poor shepherdess BATHSHUA, 20, face unseen, herds her few
               sheep homeward from the field.

                                   PRIEST (V.O.) (cont'd) 
                         - in the year one thousand B.C. 

               EXT. THE HOME OF AMMIEL - DAY (LATE AFTERNOON) 

               The peasant AMMIEL, 70-ish and frail-looking, sits dozing by
               the door of his dirt-poor hut. 

               Bathshua, pretty though in rags, puts the sheep in a fold by
               the hut.  Also in the fold is NABAL the ass.  

               Bathshua goes to Ammiel and puts a hand on his shoulder.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Father . . .

               Ammiel wakes up.

                                   AMMIEL
                         Bathshua, has Dodo come back?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         No, Father, Dodo is gone.  Let's 
                         go inside.

               INT. HOME OF AMMIEL - DAY (LATE AFTERNOON)

               Bathshua helps weak Ammiel sit down on his bed.

                                   AMMIEL
                         How could that brother of yours
                         leave us and go hop a caravan?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         He said something about wanting 
                         to find himself.  

                                   AMMIEL
                         Find himself?  How hard is that? 
                         I'd like to find him, I'd -

                                   BATHSHUA
                         You lie down and rest, Father.  I'm 
                         going to the river to bathe.  Then
                         I'll be back and fix supper.

                                   AMMIEL
                         Come here, my child.

               Bathshua kneels beside her father.

                                    AMMIEL (cont'd)
                         Lovely Bathshua.  A beauty fit for 
                         a king.  And look what you wear.  
                         And I can't even help with the 
                         work.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         You don't have to help, Father.  

                                   AMMIEL
                         Your mother was beautiful too,
                         bless her poor sweet nephesh.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         There's something I might as well
                         tell you.

                                   AMMIEL
                         That worthless Dodo.  How could 
                         he have come from my loins?  

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Father, listen to me.  I -

                                   AMMIEL
                         But you are a jewel.  By now you
                         should be someone's wife, my child. 
                         Gomer wants you, Enos wants you.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Why would I want either of them?

                                   AMMIEL
                         You could have any peasant in Israel.

                                   BATHSHUA 
                         Who wants to marry some poor shepherd
                         as bad off as we are?  Father, I'm
                         trying to tell you, I have a plan.

                                   AMMIEL
                         What?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         I hope to be fit for a king, as you
                         say.

                                   AMMIEL
                         What plan?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         I'm going to start bathing at the
                         river where it's nearest the palace,
                         where perhaps King David will see
                         me, and - you know -

                                   AMMIEL
                             (reproachingly)
                         Bathshua!

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Then perhaps I can join his harem. 
                         What do they call them - concubines? 
                         Or even be a wife of the king.  
                         Then we can live in a palace and -

                                   AMMIEL
                         Bathshua, what kind of woman are
                         you?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         A dirty one, Father.  I need to go 
                         bathe.

                                   AMMIEL
                         Then go where you said you were going!

               Bathshua rises to go.

                                   AMMIEL (cont'd)
                         But don't show too much.  

               EXT. THE RIVER AND PALACE - DAY (LATE AFTERNOON)

               COMMON FOLK bathe in a narrow river outside Jerusalem's west
               wall.  Behind the wall stands the royal palace.  Between the
               river and wall is a narrow dirt road.  

               INT. THE PALACE - A CORRIDOR - DAY (LATE AFTERNOON)

               Handsome KING DAVID, 40, looks at a papyrus document as he
               walks with palace official HUSHAI, 38.  David hands the
               document to Hushai.

                                   DAVID
                         Give it to J, for the royal court
                         history.

                                   HUSHAI
                         With pleasure, my lord O king.

               The 40-ish palace EUNUCH comes walking the other way.

                                   HUSHAI (cont'd)
                         Here comes that new eunuch.

               The eunuch bows as they stop.

                                   EUNUCH
                             (falsetto)
                         My lord O -

               The eunuch clears his throat, then speaks with a less high
               pitch.

                                   EUNUCH (cont'd)
                         My lord O king.  Which concubine
                         does the king wish to have this
                         evening?

                                   DAVID
                         Oh . . . Keturah.

               The eunuch bows and starts to go.

                                   DAVID (cont'd)
                         No.  Milcah.  No.  I don't know. 
                         Surprise me.  

               The eunuch leaves.  The palace official IDBASH, 40, appears
               and presents a scroll to David.

                                   IDBASH
                         My lord O king, a message for you,
                         just received by the palace guard.

               David opens the scroll and reads the short message.  He looks
               grim.

                                   DAVID
                         That will be all for today, Hushai.

               David walks off.  Hushai turns eagerly to Idbash.

                                   HUSHAI
                         What does the message say?

                                   IDBASH
                         Hushai, do you think I read the
                         king's messages?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Yes.  What does it say?

                                   IDBASH
                         It's from his son Prince Absalom. 
                         He's back in Jerusalem.  He's staying
                         at the Holy Day Inn.  

                                   HUSHAI
                         Just like that, eh?  After murdering
                         his own half-brother, Prince Absalom
                         thinks three years of exile is
                         enough?

                                   IDBASH
                         Yes.  The prince is requesting an
                         audience with his father.  Do you
                         think the king will see him?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Well, blood is thicker than water.

                                   IDBASH
                         It is?

               EXT. THE RIVER - DAY (NEAR SUNSET)

               Bathshua, with two rags for washing and drying herself, arrives
               on foot at the riverbank.  She looks toward the palace.

               INTERCUT: EXT. THE PALACE ROOF - DAY (NEAR SUNSET)

               Idbash snacks on an apple, Hushai snacks on some dates, as
               they stroll toward the low wall of the west roof edge.

                                   HUSHAI
                         You know, the king has been seeing
                         too many strange women.

                                   IDBASH
                         What is strange about them?

                                   HUSHAI
                         I mean women who are strangers.  He
                         has all the concubines he needs. 
                         He's been overextending himself.

                                   IDBASH
                         I wouldn't say that.  Even if David
                         wasn't king, he could get all the
                         strange women he wanted. 

               They stop at the roof edge.  

                                   HUSHAI
                         The thing is, the king could catch
                         some disease.  There's no telling 
                         where some of these women have
                         been.

                                   IDBASH
                         Or who has been in them.

                                   HUSHAI
                         What if the king were to die from
                         such illness?  Would you want to
                         see that no-account son of his on 
                         the throne?

                                   IDBASH
                         No, that would be awful.

                                   HUSHAI
                         And think about us.  You and I
                         would be out of here, finished -
                         replaced by Absalom's gang.

                                   IDBASH
                         Hushai, we've got to do something
                         about all these strange women.

                                   HUSHAI
                         For the king and the kingdom.

                                   IDBASH
                         And above all for us.

                                   HUSHAI
                         So here's what we do.  Whenever the
                         king sees a woman and desires her,
                         we should give him some reason to
                         believe she is someone he shouldn't
                         go after.

                                   IDBASH
                         She's married, she's a peasant, 
                         or something like that.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Exactly.  

               Bathshua, with other folks bathing around her, stands bathing
               in the water, not yet too revealingly.  She briefly notes
               Hushai and Idbash at the low wall of the roof.

               David comes strolling to the roof wall to join Hushai and
               Idbash.

                                   HUSHAI (cont'd)
                         My lord the king.

                                   IDBASH
                         It is going to be a lovely sunset,
                         O king.

               Bathshua now sees David standing at the roof wall with Hushai
               and Idbash.

               Bathshua casually exposes her breasts.

               David looks thoughtfully off toward the river and its bathers,
               Hushai and Idbash (still eating his apple) beside him at the
               wall of the roof.

                                   HUSHAI
                         What seems to be troubling my lord
                         the king?

                                   DAVID
                         The war with the Ammonites.  And
                         that son of mine back in town.  He 
                         wants to come see me.  And - my
                         God, do you see that young woman
                         bathing?

               Seeing Bathshua, Hushai and Idbash glance at each other.

                                   HUSHAI
                         I certainly do, O king.  She 
                         is very attractive -
                             (pointedly)
                         - considering the fact she's a
                         peasant.

                                   DAVID
                         I want to know who she is.  One of 
                         you is going to find out and tell 
                         me, as swiftly as eagles fly.

                                   HUSHAI
                         As my lord the king wishes.  Uh,
                         did I mention she's a peasant?

                                   IDBASH
                         My lord O king, now that I look at
                         her face, I believe that girl is
                         Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam.

               Hushai frowns at Idbash and shakes his head "no."  Idbash
               forges ahead, David's eyes remaining on Bathshua,

                                   IDBASH (cont'd)
                             (pointedly)
                         The wife of Uriah the Hittite.

                                   DAVID
                         You can tell from this far away?

                                   IDBASH
                         I'm sure she's Bathsheba, my lord.

               Idbash discards his apple core over the wall of the roof.

                                   DAVID
                         But Uriah the Hittite's no peasant. 
                         Why would his wife bathe here, with
                         common folks in the river?

               Hushai and Idbash both seem at a loss for words.

                                   IDBASH
                         Hushai, why do you think she would
                         do that?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Why, uh, to let them know that she
                         cares?

                                   IDBASH
                         Yes, that must be it.

                                   DAVID
                         Uriah is away, fighting on the
                         Ammonite front, is he not?

                                   HUSHAI
                         I am sure that he is, my lord. 

                                   DAVID
                         Then his wife Bathsheba is lonely.
                         Have her brought to my quarters
                         tonight.  I'll give her an evening
                         of solace.

               David turns to head for the stairs.

                                   HUSHAI
                         The compassion of the king is so
                         boundless.

                                   IDBASH
                         It is truly a blessing to Israel.

               Hushai and Idbash wait till David is gone.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Look what you've done.  

                                   IDBASH
                         I did like you said.  I thought 
                         of someone he shouldn't go after, 
                         a married lady.  I thought of
                         Bathsheba.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Bathsheba, the wife of Uriah, is
                         the biggest slut in Jerusalem.

                                   IDBASH
                         That's why I thought of her. 

                                   HUSHAI
                         The king apparently knows nothing
                         about her.  What if Uriah finds out?  

                                   IDBASH
                         That his wife is a slut?

                                   HUSHAI
                         That his wife has supposedly slept
                         with the king.

                                   IDBASH
                         What can he do about it?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Have you seen Uriah the Hittite? 
                         And it's not even true.  It looks
                         like the king is going to sleep
                         with some peasant tonight.  Who 
                         is she?

                                   IDBASH
                         How should I know?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Why don't you go down and find out?

                                   IDBASH
                         I could go tell the king I was
                         wrong, that she's not who I said.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Basically admit that you lied?  The
                         king - thanks to you - is expecting
                         Bathsheba tonight.  You wish to
                         disappoint him?  Idbash giveth, and
                         Idbash taketh away?  If I were you, 
                         I would get that peasant girl to 
                         pretend she's Bathsheba this
                         evening.  I am sure she wouldn't
                         mind.  How many peasants get to
                         sleep with King David? 

                                   IDBASH
                         So much for disease control.  I'll
                         go down and find out who she is.

               Idbash turns to go.

               EXT. THE ROAD BY THE RIVER - DAY (NEAR SUNSET)

               Bathshua starts north toward home.  Idbash approaches her.

                                   IDBASH
                         Young lady!

               Bathshua stops and turns as Idbash joins her.  Common folks
               pass or continue to bathe.          

                                    IDBASH (cont'd)
                         I am Idbash, from the court of King
                         David.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Good day, my lord.  And my name is -

                                   IDBASH
                         Bathsheba.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         No, it's -

                                   IDBASH
                         Your name is Bathsheba.  Just for
                         tonight.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         The king wishes to see me?

                                   IDBASH
                         The king wishes to do more than
                         that.  Well, what I mean is, he
                         wishes to show his compassion.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         But I have nothing to wear.

                                   IDBASH
                         Be at the palace at the seventh
                         hour.  We will fix you up nice
                         for the king.

               INT. A PALACE CHAMBER - NIGHT

               The servant girl SHEERAH, 25, finishes primping Bathshua, dressed
               in stunning robe and jewelry.  Hushai and Idbash stand by.  

                                   HUSHAI
                         We'll bring her out in a moment,
                         Sheerah.

               Sheerah leaves.

                                   HUSHAI (cont'd)
                         Now remember, your name is Bathsheba,
                         and your husband is Uriah the
                         Hittite, who is away at the war
                         front.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         But if I am married . . .

                                   HUSHAI
                         You'll be committing adultery.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         But I'll just be pretending I'm
                         married.

                                   IDBASH
                         Then you'll just be pretending 
                         you're committing adultery.

                                   HUSHAI
                         No, she'll actually be doing it.

                                   IDBASH
                         Why?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Because the king is married, to
                         more than one woman.

                                   IDBASH
                         Then it's the king who's committing
                         adultery, not her.

                                   HUSHAI
                         But she'll be helping him do it.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         What are you two talking about?
                         Look, if the king thinks I'm 
                         married, I won't become part of 
                         the harem.  This is just for one
                         night?

                                   IDBASH
                         One night with the king of Israel.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         But why must I be Bathsheba?  Why
                         can't I be me?  Bathshua.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Because the king has been told
                         you're Bathsheba.  You will do 
                         as the king has been told.  No 
                         one lies to the king.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         So what you want me to do is -

                                   HUSHAI
                         - lie to the king.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         But . . .

                                   HUSHAI
                         But what?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         I'm a virgin.  Does that matter? 
                         Do you think he will notice?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Tell the king that your husband is
                         impotent.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Tell him he's what?

                                   IDBASH
                         Tell him that Uriah can't do it.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         "Can't do it"?  Oh, you mean, uh - 
                         like sheep do?

                                   IDBASH
                         No, don't tell him Uriah is sheep
                         doo.  Tell him -

                                   HUSHAI
                         I think she understands what we
                         mean.  She's been around sheep all
                         her life.

               INT. CORRIDOR OUTSIDE THE CHAMBER - NIGHT

               Hushai and Idbash watch Bathshua being escorted away by Sheerah
               for her visit to the king.

                                   HUSHAI
                         A fine thing this is, you telling
                         the king that woman is Bathsheba.

                                   IDBASH
                         Look, you said when the king sees 
                         a woman who -

                                   HUSHAI
                         That's not the point.  You spoke
                         without thinking.  We have to be
                         subtle.  We must never lie to the
                         king.  We should never lie, period. 
                         Do you see where lying will get
                         you?

                                   IDBASH
                         No.  Where?

                                   HUSHAI
                         That's right.  Nowhere.

                                   IDBASH
                         What?

               INT. A CORRIDOR - NIGHT

               Bathshua and Sheerah talk as they walk past the open door of 
               a chamber.

                                   SHEERAH
                         Oh, the king has about twelve
                         concubines.

               Handsome MOZA, 25, well dressed, steps out of the chamber 
               as if to see who he hears.

               Watching the girls walk away, Moza gets only a glimpse of
               Bathshua's profile as Bathshua talks with Sheerah.

               Moza looks intrigued as he watches.

               INT. DAVID'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               Bathshua stands radiantly before David.  Sheerah, having escorted 
               her, leaves.

                                   DAVID
                         Bathsheba.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         That's what they call me, O king.

               David takes her hands in his.  He looks at them.

                                   DAVID
                         Why does the wife of Uriah have
                         such hard-working hands?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Well, I was a shepherdess, before
                         I met, uh - who did you say?

                                   DAVID
                         Uriah.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         That's right - Uriah.  I'm sorry, 
                         O king, I'm overwhelmed by your
                         presence.  I can't even say my 
                         own name.

               David gently opens her robe.  She wears nothing underneath.

                                   DAVID
                         I used to be a shepherd myself.
                             (admiring her breasts)
                         In the hills of Bethlehem.

               INT. MOZA'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               Moza checks his appearance in a polished bronze mirror. 
               Liking what he sees, he turns to go.

               INT. DAVID'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               David and Bathshua sit down on the edge of the bed.  They
               tenderly kiss.  David lies her down on the bed.

               INT. CORRIDOR OUTSIDE HUSHAI'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               Moza walks along expectantly, glancing about, as if on his
               way to a secret rendezvous.

               Moza acts casually as Idbash enters the corridor and comes
               walking by.

                                   IDBASH 
                         Hello, Moza.  Where are you headed?

                                   MOZA
                         Oh, just thought I'd go stroll in
                         the courtyard.  Say, is today the
                         king's birthday or something?

                                   IDBASH
                         No.  Why?

                                   MOZA
                         That young lady I saw tonight,
                         being escorted his way.

                                   IDBASH
                         Oh.  Her name is Bathshua.  But
                         tonight she's Bathsheba, because -
                         Never mind.  It's all on a need-
                         to-know basis.

               Moza nods understandingly and moves off.  Idbash enters
               Hushai's quarters.

               INT. HUSHAI'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               Hushai worriedly paces and thinks as Idbash comes in.

                                   IDBASH
                         What's the matter, Hushai?

                                   HUSHAI
                         If that damsel stays with the king
                         too long, she might start talking. 
                         The king might find out who she is. 
                         Or at least who she isn't.

                                   IDBASH
                         Don't worry, Hushai.  They may do
                         no talking at all.

                                   HUSHAI
                         "Don't worry"?  Would you like to
                         be flayed by the king, for lying
                         about the woman he's with?  

               INT. DAVID'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               David and Bathshua make love.

               EXT. COURTYARD - NIGHT

               Moza walks along a garden, as if expecting to meet up with
               someone, in the moonlit courtyard.

               A pair of hungry feminine arms reach out, the hands pulling
               Moza into some shrubbery.  Immediate sounds of passion.

               INT. HUSHAI'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               Hushai thinks, Idbash waiting.   

                                   HUSHAI
                         I've got it.  Here's what I think
                         we should do.

               INT. DAVID'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               David and Bathshua lie in bed.  

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Is it true, my lord, that as a boy, 
                         with only a sling, you slew the
                         Philistine giant Goliath, who was
                         eight feet tall?

                                   DAVID
                         No, that isn't true . . . Goliath
                         was nine feet tall.

               Bathshua smiles.  David admires her.

                                   DAVID (cont'd)
                         The Lord has smiled on the king 
                         of Israel.  I feel like writing 
                         a psalm.

               INT. HUSHAI'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               Hushai pours some wine, looking relaxed now.  It's Idbash,
               standing by, who looks worried.

                                   IDBASH
                         I'm not sure we should do this.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Idbash, it will look like an
                         accident.  Culprit unknown.  No 
                         one is going to get hurt.

                                   IDBASH
                         Why don't you go do it?  You thought
                         it up.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Yes, because of your lying.  I have
                         to get you out of trouble again,
                         and now me too.  Why is it always
                         up to me?  Why do I have to come 
                         up with ideas?  Why do I have to
                         implement them?  Why do I have to
                         think and do, think and do?  Do 
                         you want me to get burned out?

                                   IDBASH
                         No, I wouldn't want that.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Then go set the fire.  Just don't
                         burn us out.

               INT. DAVID'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               David and Bathshua lie in bed as before.

                                   DAVID
                         How long have you been with Uriah?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Oh, not very long.

                                   DAVID
                         "He can't do it."  Has he tried
                         love potions?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Yes, I think he's tried nine of
                         them.  

                                   DAVID
                         Nine?  He might as well give up.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         If only I could stay with you, O
                         king.  

                                   DAVID
                         Tell me, why would you like to do
                         that?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         I think I love you, O king.  

                                   DAVID
                         Why do you think so?

                                   BATHSHUA
                         What woman wouldn't love you?  The
                         king, and so handsome, and - how
                         should I say it?  You can do it.

                                   DAVID
                         And how easily I could love you. 
                         There's something about you,
                         Bathsheba.  Not just your beauty. 
                         It's who you are.  Intelligent, 
                         but with a delightful kind of
                         innocence.  Of course, being
                         married to Uriah would explain 
                         the innocence part.

               EXT. THE PALACE - NIGHT

               Smoke comes out of a window.

               INT. DAVID'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               David lies musing.  Beside him, Bathshua looks like she's
               dying to tell him something. 

                                   BATHSHUA
                         How many wives do you have, O king,
                         besides all your concubines?

                                   DAVID
                         Two.  One is the mother of Absalom
                         and Tamar, the other the mother of
                         Amnon.  Those mothers are always
                         fighting each other. 

                                   BATHSHUA
                         And the concubines?

                                   DAVID
                         They fight each other too.  Every
                         woman wants to be number one.  It
                         all becomes tiresome.  Sometimes I 
                         wish I was the eunuch.  But then 
                         I couldn't have you.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         If I were not married, could I be
                         wife number three?  Or one of your
                         concubines?  I would take any number.

                                   DAVID
                         If I could have you as a wife,
                         Bathsheba, I'd feel like a new man. 
                         With you I would have a new heir. 
                         The heir I have now is a problem.

               EXT. THE PALACE - NIGHT

               PALACE GUARD #1 sees the smoking window.

                                   GUARD #1
                         Fire!

               INT. DAVID'S QUARTERS - NIGHT

               David and Bathshua, obviously unaware of the fire, share a
               passionate kiss.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         My lord O king, . . . what if I
                         said to you - 

                                   HUSHAI (O.S.)
                         Fire!!

               Hushai hurries in, shielding his eyes so as not to see their
               nakedness.  He is followed in by Palace Guard #1, who also
               shields his eyes.  TWO GUARDS wait outside.

                                    HUSHAI (cont'd)
                         Fire, my lord, come!  I will get 
                         the lady outside.  The guards will
                         get you to safety.

                                   DAVID
                         How big is it?  Where is the fire?

                                   GUARD #1 
                         We don't yet know.  There is smoke.
                         You must come with us, O king.

               EXT. THE FRONT ENTRANCE - NIGHT

               Bathshua, still wearing the fine robe they gave her, hands
               Hushai the last of the jewelry she wore as he hurriedly 
               shows her out.  

                                   HUSHAI
                         Now you go ahead home.

               Sheerah hands Bathshua's ragged clothes to Hushai.  He 
               passes them on.

                                    HUSHAI (cont'd)
                         Here's your clothes.

               Hushai turns to go back in.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Hushai, tell my lord the king 
                         that I . . .

                                   HUSHAI
                         Tell him what?  Don't forget who
                         the king thinks you are.  

               Bathshua looks disheartened.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Tell him I had a nice time.

               Bathshua turns to go.

               INT. A PALACE CORRIDOR - NIGHT

               Smoky.  With buckets of water PALACE GUARDS #2 and #3 put out
               the last of the fire on what's left of smoking window drapes.  

               Other guards and Idbash look on.  PALACE GUARDS #4 and #5
               turn to leave, as all is under control.

                                   GUARD #4
                         All that smoke.  Thank God it was
                         only drapes.

               EXT. THE HORIZON - DAY (MORNING)

               There's a beautiful sunrise.

               INT. DAVID'S QUARTERS - DAY

               David lies in bed again, staring wistfully into space.

               EXT. A FIELD - DAY 

               Bathshua, tending her grazing sheep, looks off forlornly at
               the walled city and palace.

               INT. THE PALACE - J'S QUARTERS - DAY 

               A pretty, 30-ish woman called J sits writing on papyrus in
               her document-filled room.  J dresses quite sexily for a court
               official - ample cleavage, bare navel, etc.

               Hushai enters through the open door.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Good morning, J.

                                   J
                         Good morning.

               Hushai leans down to her, seemingly as close as he dares, to
               hand her the papyrus he has brought.

                                   HUSHAI
                         The king wants this document in the
                         royal court history.

               J looks at the document, Hushai looking at J with desire. 

                                   J
                         Who was that woman who slept with
                         the king last night?

                                   HUSHAI
                         J, you're the court historian,
                         not some gossip-mongering -

                                   J
                         The king wishes everything in the
                         record.  He will edit out what he
                         doesn't want later.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Hmm.  Fair enough.  Her name is
                         Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam. 
                         You know, I really like your writing.

                                   J
                         Do you?

                                   HUSHAI
                         I read your account of the flood.
                         What a thriller.  This could all 
                         go into a great big book someday.

                                   J
                         Hushai, isn't Bathsheba the wife 
                         of Uriah the Hittite?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Yes.  What do you think about that?  

               J rises with the papyrus.

                                   J
                         Keep me informed, will you?  That
                         big book you speak of could be a
                         bestseller.

               J walks toward a table of documents, Hushai watching her
               form.  She stops and looks back at him.

                                   J (cont'd)
                         Is there anything else?

                                   HUSHAI
                         I'll see if I can find something.

               Hushai turns to go.

               INT. HOME OF AMMIEL - DAY (LATE AFTERNOON)

               The invalid Ammiel watches Bathshua sadly grind their grain
               with a mortar and pestle.

                                   AMMIEL
                         You are too righteous, Bathshua.
                         Go to King David and tell him the
                         truth.  You are married to no one.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Father, his own men lied to him
                         yesterday - God knows why - and had
                         me lie too, about the wife of one
                         of his finest warriors.  They can't
                         claim a mistake.  It's too late.

                                   AMMIEL
                         Perhaps you are right.  These are
                         powerful men.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         They're buffoons.  But if I betray
                         them, I might not live to be 
                         any queen.  And a dead daughter
                         couldn't take care of you.

               Ammiel seems suddenly to realize something encouraging.

                                   AMMIEL
                         No, my child, you would not be
                         harmed.  It's those men the king
                         would have killed.

                                   BATHSHUA 
                         Perhaps so.  And could I live with
                         causing their deaths, as worthless
                         as they are?

                                   AMMIEL
                         I don't see why not.

                                   BATHSHUA
                         Father, the king might not want me
                         now anyway.  He said he could 
                         easily love me, but how many women 
                         have heard similar words?  He
                         doesn't even know who I am.  It 
                         is best to forget all about it. 
                         Except that . . .

                                   AMMIEL
                         What, my child?

               Bathshua goes about her work.  She whispers to herself,

                                   BATHSHUA
                         He can do it.

               INT. THE PALACE - THRONE ROOM - DAY (LATE AFTERNOON)

               David sits solemnly playing a lyre on his throne.  

               Hushai enters past TWO PALACE GUARDS at the doorway.  Hushai
               stops several feet before David and bows.

                                   HUSHAI
                         You wished to see me, O king?

                                   DAVID
                         Yes.  I have been told that the
                         fire last night involved some
                         window drapes.

                                   HUSHAI
                         That is correct, my lord O king.  

               David sets aside the lyre in a seemingly calm fashion.  He
               rises and walks over to uneasy Hushai.

                                   HUSHAI (cont'd)
                         Someone must have gotten too close
                         with a torch, O king.  We don't yet
                         know who it was.

                                   DAVID
                         I don't care who it was.  You took
                         Bathsheba out of my bed, and had
                         guards drag me out of this palace,
                         over some window drapes?

                                   HUSHAI
                         I was only thinking of my lord the
                         king's safety.  At the time, my 
                         lord, I didn't know what was on
                         fire in the palace.

                                   DAVID
                         Well I knew what was on fire, and
                         it wasn't some drapery.  Then you
                         came in like a pail of cold water.

                                   HUSHAI
                         I am sorry, O king, I -

                                   DAVID
                         Next time, you find something out
                         first, before I'm disturbed.  If
                         you don't, do you know what will
                         happen?  

                                   HUSHAI
                         Not precisely, O king.

                                   DAVID
                         If I choose to be merciful, it will
                         be quick and you won't feel much
                         pain.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Your mercy is always a cause for
                         rejoicing, my lord O king.

                                   DAVID
                         Now I want you to get out of my
                         sight.

                                   HUSHAI
                         The king need only wish and it is
                         done, my lord.

               Hushai bows and heads for the door.  

                                   DAVID
                         Hushai . . .

               Hushai stops and looks back.  David beckons him.

                                   DAVID (cont'd)
                         Don't get out of my sight yet.

               Hushai walks back to David, who puts a hand on Hushai's
               shoulder.

                                   DAVID (cont'd)
                         Did Bathsheba say anything when she
                         left last night?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Yes, my lord.  She said, "Tell the
                         king that I had a nice time."

                                   DAVID
                         That's all she said?

                                   HUSHAI
                         Yes, my lord.  I am not the royal
                         counselor, but may I give my lord
                         the king some advice?  

                                   DAVID
                         Go ahead.

                                   HUSHAI
                         Do not see the wife of Uriah the
                         Hittite again.  What can it cause 
                         for my lord the king except trouble?

               A pause as David seems to take the advice to heart.  

                                   DAVID
                         She's different from all the women
                         around me.  She reminds me of the
                         peasant girls I knew as a shepherd
                         boy.  She's more like them than 
                         any warrior's wife.  But you're
                         probably right.  It was not meant
                         to be.  Now get out of my sight.

               EXT. THE HOME OF URIAH - JERUSALEM - DAY 

               TWO MEN, one in a hooded cloak, arrive on horses.  SUPERIMPOSE:

                          THE HOME OF URIAH THE HITTITE

               INT. HOME OF URIAH - DAY

               Worldly-looking BATHSHEBA, 30, eagerly lets in one of the
               men.  He is handsome PRINCE ABSALOM, 23, revealing his long
               flowing hair as he removes his hood.

                                   ABSALOM
                         Hello, Bathsheba.

               Absalom and Bathsheba hungrily embrace and kiss.  The other
               man, 30-ish JAVAN, waits outside.

                                   BATHSHEBA
                         Is it really you, Absalom?  What
                         took you so long to come see me?

                                   ABSALOM
                         I didn't know Uriah wasn't here.

                                   BATHSHEBA
                         It'll be so good to have a man for
                         a change.

                                   ABSALOM
                         Your husband isn't a man?

                                   BATHSHEBA
                         He can't do it.

                                   ABSALOM
                         You're kidding.

                                   BATHSHEBA
                         No, I'm not.  Who could make up
                         such a story about mighty Uriah 
                         the Hittite?

                                   ABSALOM
                         I'll come see you every day - or
                         you can come see me at the inn -
                         while your impotent warrior's away.

               INT. THE PALACE - A COUNCIL CHAMBER - DAY

               At a table David sits signing papyrus documents for Idbash,
               while Hushai stands by.  SUPERIMPOSE:  

                               TWO MONTHS LATER

               David pauses, his mind seemingly elsewhere.

                                   DAVID
                         Idbash . . .

                                   IDBASH
                         Yes, my lord?

                                   DAVID
                         Send a man to the house of Uriah
                         the Hittite.

               Hushai and Idbash exchange glances.

                                   IDBASH
                         "The house of Uriah the Hittite."

                                   DAVID
                         Have him tell Bathsheba . . .

               Idbash glances again at Hushai, as if for help.

                                   IDBASH
                         "Tell Bathsheba."

                                   DAVID
                         Why are you repeating what I say?

                                   IDBASH
                         Forgive me, my lord.  When the king
                         speaks, it is such music to my ears
                         the refrain leaps forth from my lips.

                                   DAVID
                         I wish to see Bathsheba again. 
                         Tonight.  For two months I've tried 
                         to forget her, but can't.



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